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ilovemaltipoos Senior Member

Joined: 22 Mar 2004 Posts: 825 Location: Alabama
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Posted: Sun May 23, 2004 8:20 pm Post subject: Up on the Housetop ? or otherwise known as |
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SO.......THIS IS WHAT A DRIVEWAY LOOKS LIKE !
to my son .
OKAY ! ...I know your dad is late" It is Christmas eve and what can I do ?.The office party is still going on and I got a million errands to run and a child that suppose to be at a friends and again Robert is late .Well,darn it .."Adam ,come on and I will drop you off to exchange gifts ,then pick you up on the way back from the airport "
MEN! ....oh well ...a normal day for us ,but roberts office decided to have the annual party on ...yes Christmas Eve . A day when we have family arriving at the airport ,a child that has a party to go to and it is a hectic day anyway and WHERE IS MY HUSBAND ? NOT HOME ! or so I thought ...
Carrying an armload of gifts and and followed by a 7 yr old that is fussing ,running late to get to the airport ,here I go trucking out the door and run right into ....MY HUSBAND LAYING IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DRIVEWAY .
Now ...at first I thought ...okay he is really done it this time ,got totally loaded and could not make it into the house ....mad was not the word I was experiecing at the time .Adam runs to him and says'DAD !!! ,What ya doing down there ? " ,Robert grunted ,he is alive I thought . I put the packages in the car as Robert is slowly turning over and I told Adam ,"he is just checking to see if our driveway needs paved , now get in the car ,let him lay there " I thought to myself ,I would not help him in the house if it killed him! he could sober up and get himself into the house .
Well adam got in the car and slowly we backed out ,I took one more look and Robert was still laying there ,discusted I just pulled away ,we left and went shopping ,picked up a few groceries ,picked up my brother and family at the airport .Adam went to his party .Picked him up and headed home ,full of laughter and happiness and all the time I was thinking ...LORD ,please let him be sober when I get back .(Robert has the tendency when drinking to go all out at it ,love him with all my heart but sometimes ...... .....)
on the way back ...my brother asks Adam 'where is robert " Adam ,being a 7 yr old says "LAst time I saw Dad he was checking out the driveway "
Now ,we get home ,all lights are off ,and no sign of Robert anywhere .Not in our bedroom or the bath ,not in Adams room .We show our company to their rooms and then I get the groceries out and head through the garage to the kitchen and just inside the door sits Robert on the floor with an envelope in one hand and an ice pack in the other !
Lord ! This all I need ...He is still DRUNK !! I try to ignor him and he pulls at my pant leg and points to his mouth ,I look down at him and his whole face is swollen ..."what did you do ? get in a fight too " ...No ,he shook his head and pointed again to his mouth .I squatted down ,held his face up and his front teeth was gone ..He handed me this note on the back of the envelope :
"I came home early ,you were in ther shower ,Adam was next door playing .A few lights had burned out on the roof and so I climbed up there to replace them .I was starting to climb down when a bird flew right in my face ,I lost my balance and fell off the roof and bounced several times on the driveway on my face .Where the Heck did you go ? I NEED A DOCTOR !! And our driveway needs repaving "
Well to make a long story short ,he spent that Christmas Eve in the hospital and I learned that to laugh was the best medicine .  |
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MyBabyShihPoo Super Senior Member

Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 1230 Location: Mentally or Physically?
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Posted: Mon May 24, 2004 3:40 am Post subject: |
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Malti, your poor husband!!! I gotta' admit though, the story was GREAT...you've had quite the life!!! |
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MonsterBailey Super Senior Member

Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 1280
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Posted: Mon May 24, 2004 4:36 am Post subject: |
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you're crackin me up here, Malti!!  |
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puttin510 Super Senior Member Plus

Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 2748
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Posted: Mon May 24, 2004 5:39 pm Post subject: |
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| This one had me in tears. You need to print these out for yourself, have you. These are stories that need documenting. LOL |
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Samsintentions Moderator

Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 4318 Location: Texas
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Posted: Mon May 24, 2004 5:45 pm Post subject: |
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Oh my!!!! I laughe dsoooo hard.
You really should write a book! The stories you could tell! |
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4Dogsihave Super Senior Member

Joined: 19 Mar 2004 Posts: 1026 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Tue May 25, 2004 2:57 am Post subject: |
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| OMG that is too funny! I your hubby able to laugh about this one? I think mine would have divorced me. But then again he is a little moody! If you ever write a book I want a copy! Havent read anything this funny in a long time. I know we should have a new section o nthe board, just for Maltis storys! |
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